Is This The Worst Baseball Team Ever?

Do you know how hard it is to be the _____ ever at anything in baseball? Do you? Do you really?

We get into these stupid debates in basketball between the oldheads and the new kids, and we just named the 75th anniversary team a few years ago. Baseball? Baseball’s got official records going back to 1876. For those keeping track at home, that’s about double. (Or 2x, for the VC crowd. I know you’re out there.)

What’s crazy is that the belt currently belongs to a team from last year. Which really puts a dent in the superlative, doesn’t it? They went 41-121, the worst record in modern history. And the saddest White Sox team ever was directly followed by the Southside Pope. Coincidence? It’s not for me to say.

What’s interesting about baseball is that, unless attendance really plummets, it’s unlikely to hurt an owner’s bottom line. The economics are such that, between the attendance, concessions, merchandising, local and national media rights, and sponsorship and advertising deals, you have to be pretty unpopular to post a loss. And even if you do, you — owner — won’t end up losing much of anything in the long run. Not when your team’s valuation soars regardless.

Consider Jerry Reinsdorf. While many of you are no doubt aware that he owns the Chicago Bulls, he also owns the White Sox. He bought them first, actually, and though the Bulls investment has made him a great deal more, even the lowly White Sox are estimated to be worth about $2B as a franchise. The year after the worst season ever. All to say: failing upwards is an option.

Owners make money by owning. It’s an asset. When that asset appreciates — in the case of the White Sox, by about 10,000% from his initial purchase of $20M — Reinsdorf isn’t going to get too worried about a few down years. Even a down decade. As long as someone will buy this team from him, he’s good. And they will! He’s currently moving control over to an Ishbia brother, and not the Phoenix Suns one. Guess he wanted a toy too.

Basically, what Reinsdorf can count on is that the rising tide of franchise valuation lifts even the leakiest dinghy. So long as teams are still these surefire investments, there’s not a ton of incentive for the owners to actually try. Provided they’re immune to public shaming, that is, which Reinsdorf most definitely is.

The biggest contract the White Sox have ever handed out is a five-year, $75M deal to Andrew Benintendi. For context, only the A’s — you know, the Moneyball guys? — can beat that (three years, $67M to Luis Severino). No other team has failed to cross the $100M mark. Even my Cardinals ponied up $130M for Paul Goldschmidt a few years ago.

There’s a famous, possibly apocryphal quote from former MLB commissioner Peter Ueberroth way back in 1985. He was upset about the lack of spending in free agency, and he told the owners:

“Let’s say I sat each of you down in front of a red button and a black button.

Push the red button, and you’d win the World Series but lose $10 million. Push the black button, and you would make $4 million and finish somewhere in the middle.

The problem is, most of you would push the red one.”

Not Reinsdorf. Reinsdorf doesn’t care that the White Sox aren’t good. He’s had this team for 45 years. They won one in 2005, when their entire payroll was $75M, and for which they should be commended. That was a middle-of-the-road payroll that year. Nothing to scoff at, but the point is: this team doesn’t have much history with aggressive spending, and it’s not about to start now.

Which brings us back to the Rockies. This Rockies team, barring a miraculous turnaround, will likely lose 100+ games for the third year in a row. There are only a handful of stretches this rough in the history of the sport, which again, is quite lengthy.

Are the Rockies trying, would you say? Only sort of. Unlike the White Sox, who have seen real declines in attendance, the Rockies are still right in the middle of the attendance rankings this season. An average of 29,000 people are heading into Coors Field a couple times a week.

But give them credit for this much. They do spend money. They just don’t spend it well. Some of that’s down to bad luck. Kris Bryant has been horrendous there, after signing a 7-year deal for $180M. They paid Nolan Arenado. They would’ve paid Trevor Story. Both of those guys ended up traded, because of course they did.

What rankles Rockies fans is not the money. It’s the leadership. This team does not invest much of anything in the way it’s run. While the entire sport has been going analytics crazy, the organization seems very comfortable investing very little in their front office. The org chart tells much of the story. Colorado hasn’t hired a GM from outside the org since 1999. Every assistant GM has been there nearly that long too. Their director of pro scouting is one of the owners’ sons.

Usually, when a team is this bad, there’s turnover. Not here. I’m all for continuity, but not this kind. It’s a tough look when the scouting is so clearly a problem — their last really good first-round pick was Jon Gray in 2013 — and nothing gets done about it because nepo.

It’s a tough look all the way around. But hey, I hear Coors Field is beautiful this time of year. And that’s why they’re prolly gonna be just fine, no matter how ugly this gets.

🎾 How did we so end up back in a bipolar era of (men’s) tennis already? I’m genuinely impressed by how quickly that happened. Jannik Sinner is 23. Carlos Alcaraz, our new king of clay, just turned 22. All indications suggest they’re on a constant collision course for what, the next decade? We are blessed.

🏀 I heard Thibs got fired while watching the French Open, and if I’m being honest, I’d rather have heard it from John McEnroe than Shams. I don’t know that I love the move — which feels like the sort of panicky, reach-for-the-shiny-thing move that the Knicks have been better at avoiding in recent years — but I guess I’m open to them finding a coach who’s willing to figure out a rotation before the playoffs. They might’ve been a little lucky to get this far. I certainly thought so, after watching that Pistons series. So I can understand why they did this, especially considering he was already on the hot seat entering the year.

🏀 Enough about that though. Haliburton, man. It’s getting to be where this isn’t surprising anymore, but that was surprising. They did not look up for it in that first half. As they’ve shown us repeatedly this year though, they’ll stay in it. Good for them. Guess that just made my pick Thunder in 6? Prove me wrong, Indiana. I’m here for it.

🏒 Something about McDavid going back up against the Panthers — who are even better this year — reminds me a bit of the MKII LeBron Cavs going up against the Warriors. The Oilers have the best player in the world, and they still seem outgunned. My STL allegiances to the Tkachuks aside, I’ll be pulling for Edmonton. Between him and SGA (and of course — great nickname — the Dorture Chamber), could be a big couple weeks for Canada. Or Nembhard? May the best Canadian win.